Excerpt from the Short Story - Fighting Destiny




An excerpt from:

Fighting Destiny
A short story by Janie St. Clair


“Hey, do you guys know why Helen Keller couldn’t drive?” Reuben joked on their way out of school one day. “Because she was a woman!”
Jeremy, Reuben, and Scott all laughed.
They were in their first year of high school and had been friends ever since junior high. A lot changed over the years, but these guys had always had his back.
Then a vision of golden hair caught his attention. There she was, standing in line for her bus. Jeremy couldn’t help but stare. He always had fantasies that they would end up together, but just a little over a week ago, she had started dating Peter and it tore his heart in two.
Now, whenever Jeremy saw her, he felt like there was a wild animal clawing his chest from the inside.
“Hey dude, there’s Alicia,” Scott pointed. “And no Peter in sight. You might have a chance to talk to her.”
“Dude, they’re dating now,” Jeremy complained.
“So?” Reuben challenged him. “Don’t tell me you’re going to let that stop you.”
He was right. He and Alicia were supposed to be together. She just didn’t see it yet. He would help her. He gathered all his courage, though knowing the guys were watching, he played up his swagger as he strutted over to her.
Jeremy got as far from the guys’ earshot as he could, but he kept his back straight and his chest out.
“Hey Ali,” he called her attention. She didn’t look happy to see him. But he would change that. “Do you have a band aid?” he asked innocently.
Her face softened. “I think so. Let me see.” She started rummaging through her backpack.
“Great,” Jeremy said nonchalantly. Then he grinned. “’Cause I scraped my knee pretty bad when I fell for you.”
She looked up at him. He could see the moment realization settled as her face melted into a sneer.
“Grow up, Jeremy,” she growled. “And anyway, I’m dating Peter now. So go find someone weak and stupid enough to fall for your dumb lines.”
He pulled her by her elbow away from the waiting bus. “Ali. Please listen. You’re the only girl I want. I mean it!” he protested when she rolled her eyes. “Ever since middle school, I always knew you were the girl for me.”
“You’ve liked me since then?” she asked, disbelieving.
“Well duh.” He tried to imitate a bashful smile. “That’s why I’m always flirting with you.”
“Flirting?” she asked dryly. “That’s what you call what you’ve been doing?”
He met her eyes and tried not to blink. “The truth is, I’d do just about anything to see you smile at me.”
“Really?”
Her face softened. He could tell he had put a chink in her armor. He was taking a play from his dad’s book. Mr. Matthews would always say things like that to calm his mom’s sensitive emotions.
Knowing his tactic was working, he gushed, “Can’t you tell? I fall apart whenever you reject me. It’s like I go weak and can’t think when I see you or hear your voice. Everything I do, I do just to get you to look at me.”
Her eyes widened and her pupils dilated as she gazed up at him. “Do you really mean that?” she whispered.
“I do. Alicia, you’re amazing. You’re like a light in the darkness. If I can’t be with you, I think the darkness would swallow me up.”
Jeremy threw all his strength into the puppy dog eyes he was giving her.
She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and say, “Um, Jeremy, I don’t know what to say. That’s super sweet, but I’m still dating Peter.”
He felt his face twist in frustration and his breaths came out in short bursts. He had used all his dad’s best lines and it wasn’t working. It always worked when his dad got sappy and poetic with his mom.
“Why are you being so stupid about this?” he yelled. “What does Peter have that I don’t?”
She rested a hand on her hip. “Well, manners, for starters.”
He scoffed.
“He always treats me with respect,” she continued passionately. “He’s kind and patient and he never yells. He helps people instead of beating them up all the time.”
“I could be all that and more!”
“Oh yeah?” she matched his volume and tone. “You’re doing a great job selling it! You’re always yelling and bullying people and laughing at horrible jokes. Open your eyes, Jeremy. You’re a jerk and everyone knows it.”
His fists clenched at his sides. “Shut up!”
“You’re the kind of guy that only a mother love. No, you know what? I take it back. I bet even your own mother doesn’t want to be around you.”
He felt the blood drain from his head. His breaths stilled. She didn’t know. There was no way she could know that his mom had abandoned their family. Abandoned him. Even Reuben and Scott didn’t know.
Her words were a dagger, twisted, in his heart. “Take it back!” Jeremy warned through gritted teeth. He felt all his rage coiling tighter and tighter, like a spring mere moments away from snapping.
“Why?” she challenged him. “It’s the truth.”
The coil snapped. “You’re nothing!” he exploded. “You understand? You’re just some stupid bimbo who thinks she’s better than everyone else!”
“Jeremy!” a familiar voice barked from behind him.
Jeremy turned slowly to see his older brother standing inside the open door of his idling car. “What do you think you’re doing?” Tommy demanded.
Tommy looked like the skinnier, taller, dorkier version of Jeremy. Jeremy had never heard Tommy so much as raise his voice, but now his brother glared at him with a look of fierce anger behind his nerdy glasses.
“Stay out of this, Tommy,” Jeremy returned.
“Wanna walk home?” Tommy threatened with narrowed eyes.
Jeremy weighed his options. The bus to his area had already left. And Alicia had run off while he was distracted.
“Fine,” he grumbled.
“Get in,” Tommy said sternly. He slipped in the car and closed the door before Jeremy could argue.
Jeremy cursed his brother under his breath as he slumped into the passenger seat and slammed the door. Tommy didn’t say anything, but Jeremy could see his lips and eyes crinkle as he kept his gaze fixed ahead.
Finally, as they drove out of the parking lot, his brother asked, “Do you talk to that girl like that often?”
Jeremy grunted. He was not ready to be lectured. Especially not by a dork like Tommy.
“She’s a stuck-up snob!” he retaliated. “She knows she likes me, but she’s playing all these games and dating this other guy, Peter, even though I’ve made it clear that I like her.”
“Peter?” Tommy asked, thrown by the revelation. “The one who lets you borrow his comics?”
Jeremy’s eyes darted to the side in a moment. “Yeah,” he lied.
Tommy kept opening his mouth like he was going to say something, but changed his mind. Until he finally settled on a thought. “Jeremy, let me ask you a question. How does Peter talk to that girl?”
“I don’t know,” he shrugged sharply. “They’re always smiling and laughing at each other,” he admitted with a sneer of disgust. “Like idiots.”
“I blame myself for this,” Tommy said in a half-whisper. “Well, I blame dad first, but I should’ve been talking to you.”
“About what?” Jeremy asked with a roll of his eyes.
“You do know why mom left, don’t you?” his brother asked in a very older-brother, know-it-all type tone.
“She was just sensitive…”
“No,” Tommy stopped him. “That’s dad’s line. And – even though there’s nothing wrong with being sensitive – it’s not even true. She was normal.”
“Dad’s the normal one,” he spat back. “Mom was the one that was always crying over stupid stuff.”
Tommy’s next question surprised him: “Have you ever felt like running away?”
“Of course,” Jeremy said with a sharp laugh. “Hasn’t everyone?”
“Maybe,” Tommy conceded. “But can you remember why you wanted to run away?”
“Well sure. Dad was yelling and said some stupid stuff. What’s your point?”
“Are you sensitive?”
Jeremy felt his blood heating. “I’m not sensitive!” he growled. “Dad was being a jerk.”
“And you didn’t want to be around him anymore, right?” Tommy said poignantly.
“Duh!”
“See? That’s not sensitive. That’s normal. When someone yells at you and insults you, you want to get away from them.”
“Are you saying you think it’s right that mom left us?” Jeremy challenged with a raised voice. “You think it’s okay that she abandoned her marriage?”
“Yeah, I do,” Tommy nodded. His voice didn’t match Jeremy’s in anger or volume, but carried a quiet intensity. “I just wish I had been strong enough to help her.”
Jeremy was seconds away from smashing his fist through the window. “She abandoned us!” he yelled. “How is that right?”
Tommy flinched instantaneously at his outburst, but then locked his shoulders and said softly, “She taught us more in leaving than she ever would’ve if she stayed. Look at you, Jeremy.” He dared to flash a momentary glance at Jeremy before looking back at the road. “Look at how you yelled at that girl then wondered why she didn’t fall head over heels in love with you. If you don’t open your eyes soon, you’ll end up just like dad, unloving and unloved. Is that what you want?”
The threat settled like a pile of rocks in his belly. But he would never admit that Tommy made a good point.
“What do you know?” he mumbled.
Tommy let out a confident laugh. “What do I know?” he repeated with a smile. He chucked his phone in Jeremy’s lap. “Check out the first picture on my phone. But if you tell dad, you’re dead,” he warned.
Jeremy obeyed out of curiosity and found a selfie of his brother with an arm around a beautiful dark-haired, dark-eyed girl with a warm and genuine smile. He was planting a kiss on her cheek.
“Who is this?” Jeremy asked, completely shocked that his dorky brother could have attracted such a beautiful girl.
Tommy let a smile escape. “That is Julia. And she’s wonderful. And if you get your act together, maybe I’ll let you meet her someday.”
Jeremy held up the phone, still not believing the evidence. “You?” he asked. “You’re dating this chick?”
“First of all, she’s not a chick,” Tommy said sternly. “She’s Julia. And second, dad can never know about her. Got it?”
“You’re ashamed of him?”
Tommy laughed bitterly. “Of course I am. There’s no telling what he would say to her – or about her. And I don’t want her to ever think – even for a moment – that I’d let anyone hurt her. See what I’m saying here, Jer? If you really want that girl at school to pay attention to you or want to be around you, you have to be the opposite of dad. You have to respect their boundaries and be calm and kind. You have to be like that kid Peter.”
Jeremy realized that he didn’t have a good comeback. He didn’t have to admit that, however. So he slumped in his seat and stared out the window.
“Dork,” he said just loud enough for Tommy to hear.





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